I hate monotony.
But who doesn't?
Just that I hate it to a little farther extent. I need a break from even the most obvious and "important" monotonous things, like brushing teeth and bathing. Instead I chew a mint gum and put on a whole deodorant can for a day (just to convey, I am not hazardous to be around any given day). So the bottom line is, I completely and wholeheartedly hate monotony.
But...
Ever since I have boarded the Motherhood bandwagon, my days are exactly, precisely the same. Even the Sundays. And holidays for that matter. I had yoga to my rescue but ever since my baby reached mobility, I lost mine. All I move is to get his things done, which is pretty much the whole day and sometimes I find myself in a time crunch to get things done. I have been trying a little off the chart (off the Google search actually) things to keep a tight hold of my sanity like combing hair once in a few days (to kill the monotony) and making my late night bathroom visits as meditational as possible. I still lose it few times a day.
But...
Somehow I don't hate it. Somehow I don't give up on the next exact same kind of day. Somehow I did not even think about it as monotonous. Until of course today, when I remembered the past me and compared it to the present me and wondered... How? How am I not getting crazy over this?
And the answer of course is my little bub. He is the only constantly changing detail of my life right now. I notice even the minutest change or development of his and that becomes the highlight of my day. I do have the darkest thoughts haunting me throughout the day, that I might have to nurse him for forever or I might never be able to pursue my career again or I will never get to visit Himalayas again (it is a big deal to me ) and many more.
Here is the biggest Motherhood lesson to learn. True, that living life on your own terms, realizing your life goals and being recognized by your work is fulfilling but living selflessly to bring up a new life, generating life goals for someone and getting recognized as someone's roots is divine and a little difficult to understand in the beginning of the journey.
With time you can and will be capable of all that you wish for but this part, the strengthening of the roots part, it needs dedication and complete devotion.
